I was wondering if you could help me. I have recently developed a significant feeling of unsatisfaction, discontent and downright displeased-ness about my body image. However, as my negativity about my own body has grown, my fascination with all things Belgian has matured like a fine wheel of Passendale.
With this in mind, I think I would like to apply for a couple of transplants to help me feel better about myself. I would like to propose that you transplant the legs of Eddy Merckx onto my body to replace the spindly things that dangle hopelessly from my shorts and the brain of George Lemaitre to help me think about clever things like 'how the universe came to be' and 'why planets are spherical'. It would definitely help me be more positive about my body image if I could prop myself up on Tour de France winning legs and think with a hugely advanced scientific brain. I might even stand more of a chance with the ladies if I can use chat up lines like, "want to see the legs of a champ?" and "could you spare me a moment to entertain my thoughts about the construction of the universe?"
Obviously, I assume you have a waiting list, but if I could have first dibs on those transplants it would be really great.
Thanks,
David Hall
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